Presents

You know what I like about getting married?

I like that every few hours the doorbell rings and yet another package arrives containing some kind of goody.

Today I got my necklace (which included a sweet note from the seller along with a present...a pearl ring! I had mentioned I was purchasing the necklace for my wedding.) I ordered from Etsy. A few hours later we received a gift from our registry (I think. I am not opening anything until after the wedding. Luck and all.). Then Kenny checked the mail and found the hairpins I ordered. Plus, the shipment tracking tells me my order from crewcuts (the girls' rehearsal dinner dresses..and perhaps a shirt for me, too.) will be here today also.

Two Weeks

Today is exactly two weeks until the wedding. Wow. I swear, just the other day, we still had eight months.

17 days and counting.

Three weeks. Holy! I mean, I knew that, but then I wrote it, and holy shit.

Over the past few days Kenny and I have been frantically trying to tie up all of the loose ends. We even sat in the surgery waiting room making phone calls on Monday. I still had not purchased shoes for the girls to wear. My parents nicely solved that one! We needed to book the limo (done!), reserve an extra hotel room for the guys to get ready in (also done!), get something for me to wear to rehearsal dinner (solved by making Kenny wear something the goes with a dress I already had), and buy jewelry for me to wear with my dress. This one was stressing me out.

The plan was for my dad to come Thursday to take me shopping for jewelry and to watch Emmi while I go to another dress fitting. Until then, I relentlessly searched etsy looking for the perfect piece, trying to get ideas.

And I found this.

And in two days it will be mine!

All of the little details are finally falling into place. By the end of today, we will have our marriage licences and the girls rehearsal dinner dresses. Yet another check mark off my list! Actually, all of the check marks off my list for now. I think, perhaps, I might be able to sit back and just enjoy it for the next three weeks.

Plus One

If your invitation does not say "and guest," then it does not mean write in one anyway.

Fifty people maximum occupancy, including our officiant and the band.

Your "plus one" is going to be standing outside.

Just sayin'.

I Knew I Should Be Eating More Cupcakes

When I picked up my dress from alterations, it was suggested I put a few clear snaps to hold dress close to my bra. So I decided today was as good a day as any to tackle that. Alone. What I didn't really think out was how I was going to get the dress on.

I did this bendy, turny stretch and managed to get the zipper up, but not the top clasp. And? The dress is literally falling off of me. Now, it could be that the top clasp would make a difference, but I doubt it. It is perfectly in line with the zipper. And the dress settles nicely to somewhere around mid-boob. Mid-boob is not where I want it to be.

The thing is, I know I lost a little weight. But, people, I went to the gym this evening to see just how much weight I had lost (no, no, not to actually work out, sillies), and it is only FOUR pounds. But on me, four pounds is a whole dress size.

I have two options. I can eat a shitload of cupcakes between now and then. Doubtful. Or I can take the dress back for more alterations.

So I broke down and called the dress shop. Tomorrow, I might go eat a cupcake.

One Month From Today.

Today marks exactly one month until our wedding.

I thought I would be that obsessive bride that talked about her wedding non-stop. By the pile of wedding magazines I amassed in the first few weeks of our engagement, you would have thought so, too. Instead, I haven't hardly thought about our wedding. Other than I wish it wasn't happening right now. I mean, I want to get married now. But just not under these circumstances.

Last night, Kenny's grandfather died suddenly. We really hoped both of his grandparents would make it to the ceremony. Emmi is having major surgery two weeks before our wedding. In a few days, they will do another CT scan looking for what has caused the movement of her electrodes. Of those causes, a growth. In other words, a tumor. Jill is having her own set of issues, and has just been prescribed two days a week of OT. Somehow, we all missed some neurological damage that has caused hypotonia (which is one of the same symptoms Emmi has, which means Jill may not just be a carrier). I have not slept more than four hours a night for the past three weeks. I am scared to go on our honeymoon, because Emmi will be going through implant activation. I am exhausted. Kenny is exhausted. We are both getting sick, and I have had a headache for days.

And I said that I thought having my wedding dress ruined was going to be the worst of it.

In the Middle of the Night

It's the middle of the night, and I am wide awake. Why you ask? Okay, mostly because Emmi woke me up. But also? Because I suddenly got fixated on the idea that if my dress isn't altered tight enough, it will fall down while I am dancing. I really don't want to flash anybody at my wedding. Now one would think, "Well just make sure it is altered correctly when you go in for your fitting on Friday." And I sure did think that. Then I started thinking, "What if they ruined it? I only have about a month until the wedding." Then, I really couldn't sleep.

So now I am worried about my boobies showing and my dress being ruined. At three in the morning. A month and a half before the wedding.

The week of the wedding ought to be real fun.

Dancing Shoes

My love of shoes is not a secret. Although, oddly enough, I only ever wear flip-flops. Anyway, there is nothing I love more than a sexy pair of high heels. And I do mean high. So I was a little disappointed when I realized that I could go no higher than 3 inches on the heel of my wedding shoes. Lower, if possible, for my dress to fall correctly. And, you know, so I have some good dancing shoes.

Right away, I found a pair of dyeables online that came in both white and ivory. They were cute enough, and the heel height was on 2 1/2 inches. Perfect. I almost ordered them in ivory to match my dress, but then it occurred to me. I could dye them black! The girls are wearing black dresses. I originally wanted a colored shoe peeping out underneath my dress. So I ordered the pair in white, planning on dyeing them later.

When they came in, I was not so happy. They weren't ugly. They just didn't really do anything for me. Damn. But really they weren't going to show that much, and the heel height was the important part. Plus, I was already on my second set of shoes (along with the second dress). These would have to do.

I dropped them off to be dyed black, hoping I would like them more when they weren't stark white anymore. I also did a little dance and prayer that they wouldn't ruin my shoes. So far, my luck is crap. I have no faith in anyone anymore!

I went today to pick up my shoes...and I loved them! Dyeing them black made all the difference (especially when they dye job was done so well).

I might have put them on with my old wedding dress (I knew I kept that thing for a reason) and danced around the house a bit just to see how they would look underneath a real dress.

Swaying to the Music

Kenny has been a good sport about all things wedding. A really good sport. Although, for the record, so have I. I know that everyone thinks the girl just loves all of this, but I wouldn't go so far as to say love. I want things a certain way. I have a certain vision, and therefor all of these appointments and things are necessary. I can't say I skip around joyously every time my day is booked with wedding appointments, though. Except the cake day. That one I skipped joyously to. Hello. Lots of free samples. And Kenny? He has been right there for everything (minus the dress stuff) without complaint. Even when I say things like, "Let's take dance lessons," and he hates to dance.

Last night we started our now weekly dance lessons. Me? I loved it. Our instructor basically spent the first lesson determining how far he thought he could take us. He kept trying this step and that one and this turn and that one to see how quickly we caught on. Kenny was a bit frustrated, I think. Just when he would get something, we would move on. But the reality was that we both caught on really quickly (although, I do have an unfair advantage with a background in gymnastics, cheerleading, and dance. Not to mention that I have actually taken ballroom dancing lessons before!) The instructor basically ended saying he could get us to a level that we could do some pretty cool stuff.

No seventh grade swaying to the music for us.

No Longer In The Business

The original florist has officially cancelled. After many phone calls and emails from me, she finally responded back with a rather short email. She simply stated that she was now pregnant and no longer in the business. Oh really? When exactly were you planning on telling me? When you didn't show up for my wedding. A week prior when my money was actually due? How incredibly professional of THE POSH PETAL to handle it this way. One would think she would honor the contracts they already have, but apparently not. Thank goodness I happen to be anal, and wanted to square everything away early (I have paid all the vendors except the band and the restaurant already).

On Tuesday, Kenny and I are meeting with two potential new florists. One came recommended by Holly (THANK YOU!), and I am pretty sure just by talking to her that she will be the one we go with. The other randomly happens to have done my future-sis-in-law's wedding. I say randomly, because it was five years ago IN ANOTHER CITY. She has since moved to Houston, and opened her business here. I had already contacted her before I discovered pics of sis-in-law on her website.

In the meantime, I started thinking I could just do my own flowers. I actually don't doubt my abilities.

A pomander (my first!) I attempted to make this weekend!

I just doubt my ability to find the time. I don't want to spend my wedding day running around like crazy, so off to the florist we go!

PS My first dress was ruined, my florist has cancelled, what more could go wrong. Did I mention our wedding date is smack dab in the middle of hurricane season?

One problem solved...

...and another one arises.

I found a new dress in two days. I LOVE the new dress. I am trying to look at the positives of having my dress destroyed. I did change venues after I purchased the first dress. I decided the new venue could use a different style dress. So that is exactly what I did. I got a different style dress. Problem solved.

Then I tried to pay our florist. And? I can't get in touch with her. She will not return my calls. She won't respond to my emails. I would just take it easy and assume something was going on right now. However, we only have two months. It took me two months to find a florist I liked in the first place! If I have to find another florist, I am in trouble!

Sewing 101. Screw that. Remedial Sewing.

I think I have lived every brides horror story.

Bride finds dress. Dress needs alterations. Bride drops dress off. Bride goes to pick dress up and discovers rips on the fabric, the worst, uneven seams a person has ever seen, needle marks all up and down every seam from the multiple attempts to get a straight seam, darts on the OUTSIDE of the dress with both thread and knot showing, halter cut at least four inches too shot ON EACH SIDE. The dress is ruined.

One very uneven dart on the outside of the dress.

Did a four-year-old sew this? My eight-year-old could have done a better job. No, really. She sews a pretty damn straight line. I am appalled that the person who touched my dress even operates a business. It wasn't like it was one, little mistake. There were so many amateur sewing errors, like the darts folded onto the OUTSIDE of the dress. I have never seen anything like this. Obviously a dress like this, a project like this, was far out of this person's expertise. Instead of saying so, though, she still attempted it....with my wedding dress!


I cancelled payment on the check for the alterations. I am also asking, nicely, for only half the cost of the dress. She should pay for the whole thing, but I almost feel sorry for the idiot. If she doesn't offer up half the cost, I am going to take her small claims court for the full amount plus my court costs.



In the meantime, I have been out shopping for a new dress. Anita happens to know the owner of Marry Go Round, a consignment bridal shop. On my limited (dress number two) budget, we found some great finds. Plus, you know, I was super excited to go to the store that was on Peter Perfect. It was like meeting someone famous! My mom, Anita, and I are headed back today for a second look at a dress plus on to one other shop. Hopefully I come up with something!

Stage One

I got the call today. Stage one of alterations is complete. I go on Friday to try my dress on. I will know then if it is all going work out.

Keep your fingers crossed.

Just a little off the sides. Or a lot.

I dropped my dress off for alterations this past week. It needs to come down 4 whole sizes. Major alterations. I am scared about how it will turn out. It was really hard for me to leave it. Is it wrong to be that attached to a bunch of fabric?

I don't think so. But I am also known to talk to my shoes. I often tell them how pretty they are.

Butterflies and Jamaica!

First, I am sure all of you Houstonians guessed that we are having our wedding at The Museum of Natural Science in the Cockrell Butterfly Center.
That's right...inside the butterfly exhibit, with butterflies fluttering around. It is one of the places I originally wanted, but had ruled out because there is a maximum occupancy of 50. Now that we are having a smaller wedding, it is not a problem. I love the outdoor feel of the rain forest setting without the threat of my wedding being rained out. I like how intimate the space feels, and how different it is from everywhere else we looked at. It is perfect for us.

Second, we booked our honeymoon trip! I am beyond excited. We will be spending a week in Jamaica. We chose a smaller 60 room hotel in Negril, which is supposed to be the more laid-back part of Jamaica. All of the rooms are separate little "treehouses."

We have also planned and overnight trip to the mountains during the middle of the week. Mostly, I plan to sit on the beach, each lots of food, and listen to lots of good music. You might even find me up there on that daybed, reading a book or two.

I don't know what I am more excited about now...the wedding ceremony or the honeymoon!

Metamorphosis.

Changes.

Our wedding plans just didn't feel right to us lately. We needed to make changes. So that we did.

The first change was the size. We never wanted a huge wedding. However, with extended family alone we were topping sixty people. Then picking and choosing which friends to invite seemed wrong. At some point we realized, it needed to be about who we wanted most to be with us on our wedding day. Our immediate families. Our best friends that we talk to daily. The couples that we go out with on the rare occasions that we leave the house! Those are the people that should be with us. We threw out the guilt we felt about excluding uncles we haven't seen in seven years, cousins and their wives whose names we don't know, and that one friend we talk to once every two years. It isn't that we don't want them there. It is just that we most need the people who we share our lives with everyday. With that in mind, we sat down and rewrote our guest list, narrowing it down to around forty people. A small group of family and friends.

The second change, the biggest change, was just how we were going about this wedding. I wanted a wedding that felt elegant and over the top. I wanted extraordinary. Kenny wanted fun and relaxing. He wanted to kick back and enjoy his wedding. Combining the two was difficult. We made lists. We searched through idea after idea. We finally came up with a great idea, a great location. A plan that fits us exactly. One that requires no waiting until March of next year.

And just what exactly are going to do? Well I will give you some hints now, and tell you all the details in the next post. No cheating if you already know!

Hint 1: These guys live nearby.

Hint 2: You will probably see some of these during our wedding.

Hint 3: Besides a band, you will hear this in the background.

My John Hancock

At lunch yesterday, one of my bridesmaids, Anita, and I determined that I must change my signature style to better match my soon-to-be new last name. And my ring. That is totally normal, right?

Currently, my signature is this

which totally fits my current last name. And, you know, is an adaptation of my dad's signature. Hey, I had a lot of forging to do back in my high school days, it was just easier to make my signature the same as his signature.

But you know, it is time for a change. After Anita showed me several of her top options, I spent the day practicing (and learning that I can't seem to spell my soon-to-be last name while writing in cursive. I keep leaving out a letter, and it isn't like it is a hard last name to spell!). Anyway, after several hours of practice (shut up, I know I had other things I should have been doing), I am leaning towards this

Now that I have that squared away, maybe I'll get around to finishing up the wedding planning.

Pictures

We are taking engagement photos on Friday. Don't you worry, Sheri helped me practice some poses. For instance the hand draped casually over Kenny's shoulder, showing off the ring. Then, of course, we worked on the arms wrapped around his neck, full on hug mode, while Kenny half smiles, half looks scared. I promised to give Sheri a wallet size of that pose, so she could gaze at us every time she opens her purse.

In reality, Kenny and I debated whether or not we even were going to do engagement photos. They all come out cheesy. Even when you try not to be cheesy. Even when you think you are all edgy and cool. It's not. It's cheesy. But we don't have any pictures of us that don't include a margarita or us in bathing suits on a beach or us at other people's weddings. Although, at least at other people's weddings we have on something other than a bathing suit. We finally conceded that engagement photos should be done, so we would have some decent pictures together other than our actual wedding day.

Being the total procrastinator that I am, left it until this week to decide what I would wear. Kenny and I aren't super fancy, so I know I am wearing jeans. I figured I would wear some cute heels of some sort. The real problem is the shirt. Do I go with white, the easy go-to color? Or do I pick an actual color? Did any of you take engagement photos? What did you wear?

Somebody Please Figure This Out

I have decided that etiquette can be stupid. Nobody agrees with anybody. Everyone has their own rules.

Although, I think I need this book. It looks funny.

This morning on Yahoo, one of the articles was about wedding dos and don'ts. I am constantly coming across articles on this topic in magazines, online, everywhere. Sometimes I agree with some points in the articles. For instance, I think I should be mindful of how much I ask my bridal party to spend on dresses and such. I also think guest should be beat over the head (probably not proper etiquette), if they do things like RSVP with their nineteen children, when you aren't inviting children. Those things, I get. But what I don't get is how in the same article it talks about how you should not specify what gifts you want (because it is tacky to demand your guest bring you gifts, and, apparently, a registry does that), and one line later it explains how you should never show up to a shower or wedding without a gift. Going a completely contradictory route, I found another article deeming it inappropriate to deviate from the registry. What?!

Now my head is spinning. You can't have a registry. You shouldn't expect a gift. The guest must bring a gift. They must go by the registry. Which is it?

March 20th

The official countdown starts today. In exactly 365 days, Kenny and I will be married.

Bridesmaid Dresses

I would really like it if one of my bridesmaids would choose this to wear.

Okay, maybe not this, exactly, as the whole ensemble falls into the $1500 range. But you know, just something like this. Anyone? Any takers?

Or you know, I am sure I could find a place to put a dress like that to good use.

Look What I Got Yesterday

The jeweler called around one yesterday to tell me my ring was ready. I kept telling Kenny that I felt like we should make a big deal out of getting the ring. Instead, we had one kid puking all day and the other one grounded for screaming at me for deleting a song from her ipod. Yippee. We did, however, treat ourselves to Carrabba's takeout after the kids went to bed last night. I even bought myself a cupcake (or four) to celebrate. I am still all excited and happy, and I can't believe how much I love it. The pictures, unfortunately, don't do it justice. But, hey, you get the idea.

My Pictures are crappy. I swear the new camera is on the to-do list. Or I will just make Sheri take better pictures for me.... :)

Something New

When Kenny proposed, he picked out a diamond, not a ring. The diamond was set on a plain band, and he told me I could design whatever band I wanted. Sure, I had spent months (okay years) showing him pictures of rings I liked, but he felt like I should have some input in the actual design of my band. Or, in other words, he got overwhelmed by all of the choices and made it my responsibility! But really, he didn't want me to end up with a ring that I only kind of liked. After agonizing over whether or not I would like the band he liked, the jeweler he was working with advised him to propose with a plain band, and then let me be in on the rest.

So Kenny took his advice, and when he proposed this is what I found sitting in my cupcake.

The jeweler told me to take my time looking around until I found what I wanted. I searched through magazine after magazine, looked through website after website. Kenny and I checked out antique shops and large retail jewelry shops. Nothing seemed to work. Either the bands I liked couldn't be set with my ring, or I didn't like the ones that could be set with my ring. It got a little overwhelming, and I started to think I would just keep it on a plain band.

However, today I had an appointment with the jeweler. I had emailed him pictures of styles I liked, and he pulled several books for me to look through. When I arrived, before he showed me anything, he pulled the band that Kenny originally wanted to get me. A simple, vintage style band that was custom made.

I slipped in on. The jeweler told me to wear it around for a bit while I flipped through the books. And? within minutes I knew it was my ring.

So, as of next week, I will have my ring on the new setting. The prongs have to be replaced to hold my diamond. Then I have to hand over my ring for one, whole long day while they set the stone. But next week, I will have my ring. I am practically giddy with excitement.

Not Music to My Ears

It was bound to happen that something would not go my way. Everything was going too smoothly, so something had to give.

From the very beginning Kenny and I picked out THE Band. It was THE one. We just had to have them. Everyone else paled in comparison. They are actually kind of well know and happen to be the Texans' house band or some such. We were a little concerned that they would not be available for our wedding date. So imagine our surprise when they were, and they were five hundred dollars under our budget. Perfect. Except? Kenny asked the band leader for the contract no less than four times, and he never would send it. We were at a loss. Did they not want to do it? What was the problem? So Kenny sent one last email politely, but forcefully, asking if they just weren't interested. The band leader? Calls Kenny within minutes. Sure they want to. He will email the contract right over.

Two days go by. No contract.

So I decide to take matters into my own hands. I call the band leader myself. He answers on the second ring, and I launch into a made up story about how I am not sure if my fiance has contacted him yet or not. I give him our details exactly, every last one, giving him to opportunity to say that he has indeed talked to us. I ask him directly if it is possible that he has talked to my fiance. He says it is not. He then asks me to email him our details, to which I reply, "Oh I can do better than that. I can send you all of the emails you have sent back and forth to my fiance that you claim to have never spoken to."

And by the way, you are no longer THE band.

The Big Reveal

While Kenny and I aren't exactly after a traditional wedding, there are certain traditions we do want to honor. It is our wedding after all. We are cutting out some of the things we hate doing at other weddings and keeping the things we feel are sacred. One tradition I had wanted to keep in our wedding was the big reveal moment as I walked down the aisle. I didn't want Kenny to see me in my dress before that moment. Except the logistics of this are becoming impossible, and we are playing around with some other ideas.

We are having both the ceremony and reception in the same venue. The venue does not have a designated bridal dressing area. They do have a really nice bathroom with a dressing area, but it would serve as the bathroom for the guests also. If we block it off, guests would arrive before the ceremony with no access to a bathroom after an almost two hour drive. I am guessing this would leave most of my guests squirming through the whole ceremony. Also, we hate that long down period between ceremony and reception, while the bridal party takes pictures. Plus we want to have some pictures outside in some other locations. The only way we can accomplish this is to take pictures before the ceremony.

Lately, I have been seeing couples set up a reveal moment prior to the ceremony with family and bridal party. That way you get that "here I am" moment, but you can still see each other before the ceremony. I could get dressed off site. We could take pictures before in several locations before the ceremony, eliminating tons of pictures between the ceremony and reception. We can all ride together to the ceremony site. It seems to solve all of the problems.

But? Will I regret not having the moment at our actual ceremony?

Score!

Before Kenny and I did anything, we made a strict budget for our wedding. We planned down to the penny what we would spend on every little thing we could think of right down to fast food the days we would be in Galveston before our wedding. We made some educated guesses on some things like flowers, dress, and catering by checking prices on websites. When it came down to actually signing some contracts and getting exact quotes, we kept finding that we had actually over-budgeted almost everything! My dress was hundreds less than we expected, the caterer was less, the transportation. Everything. Only one thing has been more than we expected, and it was seriously a few dollars. Insignificant. I have been so happy that is has been turning out this way. But? I thought for sure something would hit us soon, but so far it just keeps getting better.

I have spent weeks researching the cheapest options for invitations. Now that I have the design in mind, I starting pricing out all of the components. I found an online site that was by far the cheapest place, but I thought I would check Hobby Lobby one last time. I calculated it all out, and figured I could save another $30-60 dollars going with Hobby Lobby. Hey, a penny here, a penny there. I decided to go for it. It would add a little extra headache, as I would need to cut the paper down myself. Time is on my side, though. I grabbed everything I needed, headed to the check out and gasped in disbelief when I saw the total. It was $50 less than I thought it would be. I had stumbled upon a sale! I did a little happy right there in the store, and then called everyone I could think of to share the good news.

Best part? The printer we use for all of the marketing for Kenny's company is going to cut all of the paper down for me!

Your Presence is Requested

I have spent weeks pouring through wedding magazines and websites looking at invitations. I just keep thinking, "I could make that for half that price. In fact, I could make something better." I mean, are you kidding me with some of these prices? Hands down my favorite was the Vera Wang set of 20 for $450 dollars. I don't care how much money you have, that's just plain stupid. The more and more I looked, the more I became convinced that I really could design my own invitations at half the costs. I priced out all of the pieces, and set about working out the deisgn.

This morning, I found a design that clicked. It is far from perfect, as I used a hole punch when I couldn't find my exacto knife. Always good when you loose an exacto knife in house with two kids.... But, you get the idea. It's made with two pieces of cardstock, the white inserted into the black. I want to use a metallic black cardstock, instead of a flat black. Or perhaps, I will cut the "S" out of a metallic cardstock. The words will be printed in black ink, so that only the "S" is in red. There are a few little details to work out, but overall this is the basic idea for the invitations.


Now, how long do you think it will take me to make 150 to 200 of these things?

The Bridal Party

I am very excited about the group of girls I have as my bridal party. They represent the people I feel have been the most supportive of Kenny and I and whose friendship is invaluable to me. They are my sister, my friends from high school, college, and beyond. They are women I admire, people who make me laugh, and those I turn to when I need to vent. I am lucky to have each one in my life for very different reasons.